No one likes to hear this statement.  If you're telling them to calm down, then you obviously (in their minds) fail to see the gravity of the situation (or you're siding with the other party).  They think that they're not understood by you if you fail to see that their emotional state is justifiable and reasonable (given the circumstances as they view them).

 Instead, say something like: "I can see that this is very important to you.  Let's talk about it."  OR "Gee, I didn't realize that you were really involved in this issue.  I'd be interested in knowing what happened."

The latter ways are more respectful, and more likely to help the student "calm down".
 
 
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